Well this morning I want to fuss… why is it that we think that we should act a certain way? I know that we have an ideal in our head on what things should be acting like and what should be going on but why do we torture ourselves with putting unrealistic goals on ourselves. Why it is that people find it necessary to make stupid comments and then wonder why people look at them like they have lost their mind. Now I know that sometimes comments just get made, they aren’t trying to be rude or wrong it just comes out WRONG. Why is it that we get in our head that we need to be doing what everyone thinks and wants us to do?
For the past couple days I have been thinking and asking others about the word OVERWHELMED, it is one of those words that if people asks how you, however, is rarely used but it is often how we feel. Think about all the things that you need to do. Get up on time, get to work on time, get the children to school on time, pay your bills on time… these are our on-time things that overwhelm us. Then there are emotional ones: Feeling like we can’t do it, The dinner that didn’t go right, the child that is sick and people don’t understand and make stupid idiotic comments, having your schedule changed, having a hiccup in your day, getting upset at your child, getting upset at your spouse, feeling that you are inadequate to do all the roles you need to do, paying all the bills that you need to and not knowing where the money is coming from. The list goes on and on.
Paired with being overwhelmed is guilt, sometimes anger and being upset. So for a second I would like to talk about two of these words as I know that I always used them but I never knew what they really deep down meant till lately.
OVERWHELMED---As defined by Jen: To be overcome completely in thought or feeling, to be completely covered with, or to be faced with an overpowering or great/excessive amount of anything good, bad, or otherwise.
Sound like anything you know… are you overwhelmed with your children, your work, your bills, your circumstances, Do you feel like you are going to be crushed by all the things that are in life right now? You aren’t alone on that path.
GUILT---Again defined by Jen: To feel like you did something that is wrong or that you aren’t handling it the way that you should be.
Notice that I said Feel… see Guilt is real and is sometimes a true and realistic emotion. If you treated someone wrong, if you did something wrong then guilt is a realistic emotion. However, then there are times where it is a perceived and emotional reaction that isn’t founded. I will use me as an example, Since Zachary was blessed to be with God I have had a hard time relaxing and being focused on me, it has also been hard for us to do certain things because we weren’t able to do them for so long (like going grocery shopping or even cooking at home). But I can tell you this Guilt is an emotion that is sometimes used to make think that we are doing everything wrong when in reality things are going well.
I am trying to get better at feeling overwhelmed because honestly I feel overwhelmed 99% of the time, that doesn’t leave much time for anything else. I know that it is because of the circumstances that we are in but it has shown me that I am not the only one; I hear that word daily if not multiple times a day. I am not the only one, you aren’t the only one… we aren’t going to drown in the waves.
So when dealing with specific things I stop and I ask:
1. Does it matter? Really honestly does it matter… Is it illegal, immoral, or harmful? Tomorrow, a week from now, a month from now, years from now… will it matter? If it is no, then guess what? I need not to feel worried or overwhelmed by it. It is simply a filler in a day that is a blessing from God.
2. Can I change it? Is it something that I can control? If It is then write it down, make a list, tell a friend that you trust… I need to do this? Can you help me do this? This helps you with accountability; it helps you remember what you did to do and what you wanted to do.
3. If I can’t change it who can? God has all of it in His hands. He has told us that we will not be crushed and we will not be destroyed, that He knows the plans for us and that He knows everything about us. It is not a surprise to God. So to lay at his feet that you are angry, upset, mad, frustrated, overwhelmed, pissed off, irritated, and the list goes on is not a surprise for Him… He simply wants us to call on Him, for us to crawl up into Hands because if we are His then nothing can take us from His hands.
My Main goal is to let you know that you aren’t the only one that they waves are hitting hard and that is feeling that you are going to drown but you don’t have to be alone cause you aren’t alone